Take out a blank piece of paper and a pen or pencil. At the top of the paper, write “When I am a doctor I will … .”
Put the paper where you will see it every day – under your toothbrush, or in your kitchen next to your breakfast.
Every day for the next 30 days, answer the question and write down your answer. Shouldn’t take long, maybe a minute. You can think about your answer while you brush your teeth or while you’re making your tea or coffee.
At the end of 30 days, look at what you have written. I expect you will find at least some answers to questions you have been asking yourself (“why am I doing all this?” “do I even want to be a doctor?” “it’s got to be about more than just wanting to help others”).